These Thoughts Compelled Me to At Once Flee

The other day, I received this invitation:

“Come for dinner on the most holy occasion

When we commemorate our god’s special day.

There’ll be good food, and we’ll also pray.”

Now, I rarely attend such events these days,

I’m tired of these things, having changed my ways.

But since my friend had invited, I couldn’t say 'No',

Somehow, I managed to force myself to go.

Long prayers were said, through which I sat,

The crowd intoning their god for this and that

(I didn’t at all agree with their theology:

To me it seemed almost complete baloney).

The prayers were followed by a long talk

By a man who looked as fierce as a hawk.

“Our god”, he thundered, “is the world’s king.

He's the true ruler of every being and thing.

He is the one and only living god.

Only he deserves to be called ‘Lord’.

For every person, tribe and nation

It’s only he who can grant salvation.

Those who don’t believe in him he’ll send to Hell:

Preach this message to the world, to everyone tell.”

I almost fainted as the man went on.

My head spun wildly; I felt torn,

Disgusted at his idiocy and sheer gall,

His pomposity, the foolishness of it all,

But I kept silent, being a ‘good’ guest

(Restraining myself was a tough test!).

His arrogance pained me, but I said not a word.

I let him think that he was being heard.

I told myself, “How foolish can he be?

How can people believe such inanity?”

Worse was soon to follow, though, in just a bit.

Seeing what appeared then, I almost had a fit!

We wound our way to a vast dining hall

(There were perhaps some 200 of us in all),

And as we moved closer to take our seats,

I saw before me a huge variety of meats.

Oh what a hideous sight, a vast spread

Of birds and animals all struck dead!

Entire stuffed birds, bright pink and fat,

In the middle of the table the poor things sat.

There was chicken soup, too, and mutton pie,

And an oily concoction made of lamb’s thigh.

There was a whole goat also, from tail to nose,

And what looked like some beast’s toes.

There was fish bake, and meat-balls as well,

And other such things whose names I can’t tell.

I almost collapsed at this ugly sight.

I felt my stomach at once going tight.

I wanted to vomit and also to shout:

“Is your god some bloodthirsty lout?

Is this how he wants you to commemorate

What is his supposedly most holy date?

Does this god of yours not know the great pain

When for your bellies these creatures are slain?

Does he not feel their pathetic plight,

Or, is he completely bereft of such insight?

Does he exult when you kill and eat

Hapless animals and gorge on their meat?

If he's indifferent to their pains and screams,

He's either evil or a fiction, it clearly seems.

Your munching on their flesh with great relish

Is clearly nothing short of completely hellish!

The real God, if He exists, won’t approve of this:

Your barbarism inflicted on hapless creatures of His.

Your god’s most cruel and evil, I must say I find.

I think he’s the concoction of some devious mind.”

These thoughts compelled me to at once flee,

The nauseous sight being just too much for me.

I rushed out of the hall, as swiftly as I could,

Vowing to myself that I never again would

Attend an event to honour an evil god

Who didn’t exist, being simply a fraud.